Tag Archives: haute couture

Norma Shearer, Haute Couture!

Oh she was gorgeous, Norma Shearer. I recently saw her in “The divorcee,” “A Free Soul” and “Marie Antoinette.” If you like old movies, check these out!


Here is a piece I worked on last summer, just getting around to posting it now. Why hasn’t anyone offered me a job on a children’s television show yet?

Haute Couture

Haute couture, Haute couture
where style is demure
and fashion is pure
trace it back a century through time
just say no to the assembly line
wear your clothes, know this for sure
haute coture is always made to order.

Charles Fredrick Worth emigrated to France
started out making drapes before he made any pants
his dresses were all the rage in the 1870s
used the finest silks, spared no amenities
soon people traveled to Paris just to get fitted
cheap and plain were completely omitted
brought attention to outlines, removed excessive ruffles
so go ahead and eat those bonbons and truffles
hedonsits should be comfortable, no room for pain
helped defined the demimondaine
he designed for Austrian princesses and Cora Pearl
Sarah Bernhardt, most famous actress in the world
first to put on labels, to dispel doubt and rumors
before him there were no celebrity costumers

(more than just a Morissey song)

Christian Dior, Christian Dior, world war 2 its Christian Dior
while other rich folk fled France for their lives
he put clothes on german general’s wives
you can hate the nazis but admit they had flair
please but don’t shoot the fashion designer!
inspired heavily by flowers and nature
helped make the torso popular
give the rich what they deserve
his dresses tended to emphasize curves
thank him for costuming the soubrette
and wow he could emphasize a silouhuette

Coco Chanel in 1910
brought modernism to the world of fashion
she worked with unbridled passion
casual elegance was the rule of the game
now perfumes and handbags carry her name
first a night club singer, then a modiste
in 1910 opened her first boutique
slept with some of the worlds most famous men
like igor stranvinsky (rite of spring)
uncompromising, refused to marry, go to hell
“there are many wives but only one Chanel”
she took charge in a men’s world
not bad for a little girl from Saumur
in 1943 she was arrested as a spy
controversial its true, a victim of the times?
dress for success, dress to impress
Thank Coco Channel for the little black dress

(more than just a They Might Be Giants song) Did you know that the character of Edna Mode in “The Incredibles” was based on Edith Head?

haute couture,
let me give you a tour
put it on the cover,
don’t be obscure
if your a fashion lover
emphasize allure
you cant get more pure than
haute couture!
trace it back a century through time
just say no to the assembly line
creative entrepreneur to ensure
haute coture is always made to order

Edith Head would be sittin back grinnin
costumed three generations of beautiful women
known for wearing dark glasses
and tricking out celebrity asses
and hosting awesome soirees
with a wicked display and a kickass buffet
her stitches graced the world’s most famous hips
so think of her when your licking your lips

designed costumes in black and white for film
but transitioned to color gracefully
hugely influential on everybody
dressed marlene deitrich and grace kelly
ginger rogers and peggy lee
rita hayworth and hedy lamarr
audrey hepburn, elisabeth taylor
natalie wood tippi hedren
katherine hepburn sophia loren
patricia neal and doris day
won an academy award for Roman Holiday

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Indie Rock Cliche Bingo, Stumblebum Brass Band

Here is a little comic I made. The bands illustrated here are the Sahara Hotnights, Marnie Stern, and members of Netherfriends and the Raveonettes. You will have to click on them to enlarge enough to read.

I debuted new songs “Haute Couture” “An ode to Star Trek Villians,” and did encore performances of earlier pieces at Rosemary’s house CLOUDBERRY CASTLE last weekend. I played alongside Avery Wolves, 58 Roadsigns, Eating for two, Feeding Frenzy and Space Boots.

Caleb Kuntz added video of me performing “Knit that Shit” with Band of Zorses from the february 5th pub league.


New Teen Paranormal Romance will play a show this Friday (march 11) at the marlin. its 5 dollars and profits go towards CLUCKING BLOSSOM. We are performing with the Good Daze, Jesse Hobbes, and my good friend Greg who calls himself “Black Flowers Black Sun.” Highly Recommended.

We also made a Facebook Page.


Please add us as fans, there are things we can’t do until we have over 35 fans. Also, it helps when we are trying to book shows if the booker knows we have some fans out there. 🙂

My friends in the Stumblebum Brass Band are coming back to Alaska for a tour.

They will play in Fairbanks June 4 at the Marlin, I will be their opener. They also have dates all over the state in May and June, including: Talkeetna, Anchorage, Homer, Denali and Trapper Creek. Their live show is amazing. They have gotten arrested for playing outside on Christmas without a permit. Punk rock.

Check out their tour dates at

Frantic New Orleans style street jazz meets Punk rock frenzy

Stumble Bum Brass Band
Fuck You Lady Gaga. (no label)
New York, New York
Recorded at Bisi Studios by Martin Bisi
Mastered by Dr. Kevorkian
Key tracks Sweet Spot, 2nd Avenue, Girls, Anarchy, I Killed a Man.

The Stumblebums borrow from New Orleans street jazz for the bones of their skeleton, then punk rock for the teeth. . Those snare hits slam and that tuba is huge in the mix. The tuba is so expressive, and its pilot is adept at giving each blast character and verve, even when the tempos are enough to exhaust to anyone sane.The trumpet soars and the vocals, sometimes shouted through a bullhorn, sometimes crooned with the whisky soaked gravel, provide many “did he really just say that?” moments. Most of these songs are fast, offensive, wild and fun.
Many songs come in around 2 minutes, and would be fantastic on your mix tapes or inserted into radio playlists for a satisfying wtf moment.
Many of these songs are reproductions of sketches from their first album- redressed and touched up. Shortened and tightened perhaps from two years of intense live shows. On the first version they sounded a little flat, soggy and honestly, like they were just playing into a mic in a dead room. They sound fantastic now, Smidge’s voice and lyrics channeling vice from the great frontmen he follows, Janis Joplin, Iggy Pop, Louis Prima, Tom Waits, a touch of Hank Williams, and of course a nod to all the hip-hop frontmen who revel in being as ‘nasty’ as they can.
On “Try” they actually slow it down and let things swing. “My body’s had enough, lord I tried,” it’s a refreshing reintroduction to the blues; guitarless, undeniable, and immediate.
Jonny Balls comes out from behind the drumset to sing some lyrics on “GIrls.”  His spastic and perky drumming is hard hitting and perpetually consistent. They let him cut a brief solo on “I Wanna.” Johnny wheres the cowbell? Subtle rhythm changes in “Dirty” prove that the drum set can be a melodic element in punk rock, and help establish that the Jazz influence make sense.
Martin Bisi’s production is in your face and always faithful to the live show- the only place where there are obvious effects and overdubbing is in “Blue Eyed Blues.” Otherwise the disc just seems to be mixed and mastered very conservatively and expertly.
“Pink Cadillac,” is a nod to those 50s “oldies but goody” songs, but of course the tempo picks up and Smidge delivers a rapid fire rap. As he sings “Cuz I ain’t so bad,” he must be winking and acknowledging the nod to Louis Prima. “Hey Jonny” quotes hey Ronnie” and has a spoken intro that reminds me of the Shangri-La’s “Leader of the Pack.” It’s a celebration of cheesy pop culture, with a post-modern revisionism, or its just hilarious dirty fun. Try to keep a straight face while hear the lyrics, “Hey Jonny he’s so fine, he’s so fine I wanna fuck him from behind.”
I listened to ska punk from california back in the 90s, some of these catchy zippy trumpet lines remind me of the thrill i felt when I first heard that sound: the rich white kid angst version of authentic jamaican music.  The closest this gets to it is “Sweet Spot,” with a very busy bass line from Disco Ronnie and some “ooh ah’s” delivered like emo “ois.” This would be a great choice for a single, as its free of curses, full of catchy hooks, and the tempo changes make it consistently energizing. Here the Stumblebums enthusiastically turn up the joy and invite their listeners to dance. This track is an inspiring demonstration as to why people play music- because its the second most fun thing you can do with your fingers, I mean lips!

For fans of: Cherry Poppin Daddies, Reel Big Fish, Galactic, but that marginalizes them too much, anyone who loves passion, and doesn’t mind foul language will love this disc!

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